I just discovered this show on A&E called Hoarders.
I admittedly sat for several hours one day watching episodes. It was like a train wreck. I couldn't look away. Though, ironically, the people on this show were so used to looking away at the problem, it was now ruining their lives.
Hoarders
I think that as a people all need to take time to stop and do inventory on ourselves and our lives. Whether it be food, finances, drugs, alcohol, work, socializing, gossiping, shopping, trash, or just "stuff"... many of us are hoarders whether we admit it or not.
I've come to the conclusion after talking to several friends this month that we need to do what these professionals help the hoarders do: take inventory, decide what we need to hang on to or keep doing, and make a 3 separate piles: keep, give away, TRASH.
If we don't take spiritual, mental and physical inventory, things can become overwhelming.
It seems that so many of the people featured on this show were buying stuff and keeping stuff in order to fill a void. Like so many addictions, it seems this was no different.
********************
For the past week, the girls and I have been cleaning. Not just the normal stuff, but cleaning out closets, drawers, buckets, bags. If it hasn't been touched, we touched it this week.
Partly, I was making up for the past year. I just didn't feel like messing with any of the stuff. Being pg made me tired, so I put it off. And off. And off. It wasn't horrible. Not like Hoarders, but it did take a lot of time.
There was one particular corner that I had been putting off. Documents, mail, papers, loads of pictures AKA reminders of the past. It had been in the same pile for a few years, tucked behind something larger so I could hide it. Every day, though, when I looked that direction, I was reminded of what was there. Of the past. Ugh. Dealing with the past, though, is always necessary in order to leave it behind.
So last week, I sat down for several hours and went through it all. The girls did this with me and we talked a lot about abundance, having too much, and what others might not have.
How liberating it was to TOSS out the old stuff, To GIVE AWAY the things we no longer needed, and to realize what was important enough to KEEP.
********************
I think we must also take time to do this with our refrigerators, pantries, minds, hearts, and souls.
People must be able to decide which of their thoughts they should keep, give away, and throw out. I'm no exception. Lately I've learned that I have to be very careful about things I've been told in the past and most recently. Some of the things were hurtful, heartbreaking and disappointing. Some of the things were truth, some were told with the greatest intentions, some were told in love.
For me, all of it gets jumbled together and starts collecting in a little corner of my mind. At least once a day I need to sort things out so that I can start fresh again the next day.
********************
Women, most importantly, need to do this as their daily jobs as mom, wife, and homemaker can really interfere with this process.
I'm hoping to teach my girls to do this at least twice a year even into their adulthood.
I'm hoping to teach them that others may have more STUFF, but it doesn't always bring happiness.
I'm hoping to teach them when things are overflowing, they have too much STUFF. It's time to purge.
I'm hoping to teach them that STUFF doesn't fill holes, heal wounds, or help their self worth.
I'm hoping to teach them now so that they are able to do it as habit later.
"Clear your mind must be, if you are to discover the real villains behind this plot." ~Frank Oz
Edited to Add: A very special friend reminded me of a great site that helps with organization/cleaning/motivation. You might want to check it out if you haven't yet.
FLY LADY
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Running Your Own Race
I enjoy running.
Had you known me as a child, you'd laugh out loud. I hated running. I have fond memories of hating P.E. I use to cry when I would have to go. I dreaded it and thought my Jillian Michaels-like PE teacher was the devil. :) Unfortunately, Maddie is just like me in that regard. Poor thing. Only difference is that she loves her coaches and for that I'm so thankful.
As an adult, I've learned to reap the benefits of my running time.
1. I'm setting a good example for my girls to not be afraid to workout, sweat, and feeling pain.
2. God speaks to me. You might want to debate this, but it's true.
3. It heals my heart, mind, and body.
If I can overcome my initial thought of NO! I don't wanna sweat or get out of bed or leave my warm, cozy bed, then I jump start my day, my attitude, and my healing.
We all have wounds. We've all walked through the door of pain. We've all diminished our roles in life, what we have, who we are. We've all compared ourselves to others.
Yet, it's in those thoughts and times that we lose ourselves.
As I went for a 60 minute jog yesterday, I ran in the same lane the entire time. I stopped for a brief moment for a stretch or for a drink and then kept going. Some parts of the 60 minutes were harder and hotter than others. Despite those "I-don't-wanna-keep-going" moments, I did, and afterwards felt so much better. Stronger. In tune. Open. Breathing in Life.
Had I been running with someone else, they might have had a different run experience. They might have not stopped at all, they might have been looking to me the whole time, they might have stopped and quit. They may have decided walking was better. Or jogging. Or sprinting.
My point: We are not all going to do things the same way. We may choose a different path. We may choose a different speed. But we cannot compare ourselves to anyone else. We each have a different race to run and a different goal to reach.
Running our own race is the only way to heal our hearts and live peacefully.
Had you known me as a child, you'd laugh out loud. I hated running. I have fond memories of hating P.E. I use to cry when I would have to go. I dreaded it and thought my Jillian Michaels-like PE teacher was the devil. :) Unfortunately, Maddie is just like me in that regard. Poor thing. Only difference is that she loves her coaches and for that I'm so thankful.
As an adult, I've learned to reap the benefits of my running time.
1. I'm setting a good example for my girls to not be afraid to workout, sweat, and feeling pain.
2. God speaks to me. You might want to debate this, but it's true.
3. It heals my heart, mind, and body.
If I can overcome my initial thought of NO! I don't wanna sweat or get out of bed or leave my warm, cozy bed, then I jump start my day, my attitude, and my healing.
We all have wounds. We've all walked through the door of pain. We've all diminished our roles in life, what we have, who we are. We've all compared ourselves to others.
Yet, it's in those thoughts and times that we lose ourselves.
As I went for a 60 minute jog yesterday, I ran in the same lane the entire time. I stopped for a brief moment for a stretch or for a drink and then kept going. Some parts of the 60 minutes were harder and hotter than others. Despite those "I-don't-wanna-keep-going" moments, I did, and afterwards felt so much better. Stronger. In tune. Open. Breathing in Life.
Had I been running with someone else, they might have had a different run experience. They might have not stopped at all, they might have been looking to me the whole time, they might have stopped and quit. They may have decided walking was better. Or jogging. Or sprinting.
My point: We are not all going to do things the same way. We may choose a different path. We may choose a different speed. But we cannot compare ourselves to anyone else. We each have a different race to run and a different goal to reach.
Running our own race is the only way to heal our hearts and live peacefully.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
In Love
He melts my heart.
His eyes capture me.
His smile makes me feel like I can conquer the world.
The touch of his hand is so gentle yet so strong.
His voice makes my world stop.
His love is never-ending without gain.
Waking with him, Falling asleep with him
Laughing with him
Loving him
In Love
Friday, June 4, 2010
Shout Outs
I'm sure if you have ever blogged or are a writer you understand that feeling that comes with a topic when it won't leave you. It eats at you until you get it down on paper or out in the "open." This blog has been that way for me this week.
Many people have been on my mind and heart lately and I wanted to not only tell them in person "thank you" or "i love you," but I thought they deserved a blog shout out, even if they maybe don't see this right away.
************************
MIL's get such a bad rap these days. (mother-in-law)
On a simple google search of the term "mother in law," 99% of the results were negative. I was pretty surprised. I mean I knew that many people speak negatively about that relationship in their lives, but doesn't anyone have anything nice to say about them?
A few weeks ago as I was working with a lady I rarely get to see or spend time with, we happened upon the topic of mothers-in-law. She shared many treasures of knowledge as she always does regarding parenting boys, girls, and on being both a daughter-in-law as well as a mother-in-law.
Here's what I took from that conversation:
* The MIL/DIL relationship is a fragile one - No matter how hard each of them try to be great.
* Many times MIL/DIL miscommunicate on things and those little things turn into big things.
* MIL/DIL have different styles, like different things, and do almost everything a bit different than the other.
* It's usually hard for your spouse (their son) to understand how delicate some of those miscommunications are for the both of you.
* Being the mom of a boy is an important role, so you should take time to teach your son now some of the things that were important to you as a DIL.
* It's important to find the humor in all situations.
* No matter how hard you try as a DIL/MIL, you're usually still going to feel they "don't like you" at some point or another.
* Despite all of the above, you both love and adore the man that has become your common denominator.
My shout out here goes to:
1. My MIL - she recently spent 2 weeks with us helping while I went back to work. We cannot express our thanks enough for that care, time and the goodies she brought. She's a jewel and I'm so luck to call her my MIL. THANK YOU!
2. My ex-MIL. Yep, you read that right. She is a wonderful grandmother to the girls. They've been able to spend the past 2 weekends with her and I would never not let them go, as I know they are all making great memories with each other.
*****************
It happens every summer, but I seem to always get homesick. Oddly enough, my parents don't live in my hometown anymore, but I will always consider that place home. Even if the place and people have forgotten me, I will always have a continual pulling to go visit and experience all the good things that I remember about it.
I have a handful of friends still there or from there that I consider true, real, longtime friends. You know, the ones who even over time you can sit with and talk and it's like there was never a great distance between the two of you or that 15 years have gone by.
Not all small towns are created equal, as I've found out. I may be biased, but I think my small town is the best.
Today I talked to one of those friends and discussed a possible visit in the next few months.
This kudos is to all of my hometown peeps. You know who you are - I love you and love that even after such a long time, we are still part of each other's lives.
*****************
I love hard working, real, forgiving people. I think it's because I grew up with many people of that type. It's probably also because my dad (not a college graduate) was so successful, had a great group of friends, a very honest to goodness work ethic, and taught us that being a hard worker and being down to earth went a long way in life.
This week I've come across a few of those types of people. They always warm my heart and I enjoy conversing with them because you always know what you see is what you get. There's no other motives. There's no "fair weathered-ness" with them. They aren't trying to use you to get ahead. They don't pretend to be perfect, they don't pretend to have perfect families, they aren't afraid for you to know the "real" parts of their life.
So my next shout-out is to those great people. Because let's face it - the simple and real parts of life are sooooo refreshing.
*****************
This last shout out goes to a few people. These people have given great advice, lived humbly, and were not accidents in my life, I'm sure.
1. My long time friend, S. Though I do not see her often, she still is teaching me so much about being professional. She's a mentor, for sure, and I know that I am where I am, in part, because of all I learned from her.
2. My friend, K. She doesn't know that our week long visit was a "God thing" but like always, I take so many treasures of knowledge after talking with her. She will even talk with me about healthy food options! :)
3. My DDC peeps. These ladies rock! They offer tons of advice, support, and humor! I'm so glad I "ran" into them! :)
And here's a shout out for YOU, if you made it through all of that reading! :)
Many people have been on my mind and heart lately and I wanted to not only tell them in person "thank you" or "i love you," but I thought they deserved a blog shout out, even if they maybe don't see this right away.
************************
MIL's get such a bad rap these days. (mother-in-law)
On a simple google search of the term "mother in law," 99% of the results were negative. I was pretty surprised. I mean I knew that many people speak negatively about that relationship in their lives, but doesn't anyone have anything nice to say about them?
A few weeks ago as I was working with a lady I rarely get to see or spend time with, we happened upon the topic of mothers-in-law. She shared many treasures of knowledge as she always does regarding parenting boys, girls, and on being both a daughter-in-law as well as a mother-in-law.
Here's what I took from that conversation:
* The MIL/DIL relationship is a fragile one - No matter how hard each of them try to be great.
* Many times MIL/DIL miscommunicate on things and those little things turn into big things.
* MIL/DIL have different styles, like different things, and do almost everything a bit different than the other.
* It's usually hard for your spouse (their son) to understand how delicate some of those miscommunications are for the both of you.
* Being the mom of a boy is an important role, so you should take time to teach your son now some of the things that were important to you as a DIL.
* It's important to find the humor in all situations.
* No matter how hard you try as a DIL/MIL, you're usually still going to feel they "don't like you" at some point or another.
* Despite all of the above, you both love and adore the man that has become your common denominator.
My shout out here goes to:
1. My MIL - she recently spent 2 weeks with us helping while I went back to work. We cannot express our thanks enough for that care, time and the goodies she brought. She's a jewel and I'm so luck to call her my MIL. THANK YOU!
2. My ex-MIL. Yep, you read that right. She is a wonderful grandmother to the girls. They've been able to spend the past 2 weekends with her and I would never not let them go, as I know they are all making great memories with each other.
*****************
It happens every summer, but I seem to always get homesick. Oddly enough, my parents don't live in my hometown anymore, but I will always consider that place home. Even if the place and people have forgotten me, I will always have a continual pulling to go visit and experience all the good things that I remember about it.
I have a handful of friends still there or from there that I consider true, real, longtime friends. You know, the ones who even over time you can sit with and talk and it's like there was never a great distance between the two of you or that 15 years have gone by.
Not all small towns are created equal, as I've found out. I may be biased, but I think my small town is the best.
Today I talked to one of those friends and discussed a possible visit in the next few months.
This kudos is to all of my hometown peeps. You know who you are - I love you and love that even after such a long time, we are still part of each other's lives.
*****************
I love hard working, real, forgiving people. I think it's because I grew up with many people of that type. It's probably also because my dad (not a college graduate) was so successful, had a great group of friends, a very honest to goodness work ethic, and taught us that being a hard worker and being down to earth went a long way in life.
This week I've come across a few of those types of people. They always warm my heart and I enjoy conversing with them because you always know what you see is what you get. There's no other motives. There's no "fair weathered-ness" with them. They aren't trying to use you to get ahead. They don't pretend to be perfect, they don't pretend to have perfect families, they aren't afraid for you to know the "real" parts of their life.
So my next shout-out is to those great people. Because let's face it - the simple and real parts of life are sooooo refreshing.
*****************
This last shout out goes to a few people. These people have given great advice, lived humbly, and were not accidents in my life, I'm sure.
1. My long time friend, S. Though I do not see her often, she still is teaching me so much about being professional. She's a mentor, for sure, and I know that I am where I am, in part, because of all I learned from her.
2. My friend, K. She doesn't know that our week long visit was a "God thing" but like always, I take so many treasures of knowledge after talking with her. She will even talk with me about healthy food options! :)
3. My DDC peeps. These ladies rock! They offer tons of advice, support, and humor! I'm so glad I "ran" into them! :)
And here's a shout out for YOU, if you made it through all of that reading! :)
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