Stronger

In the past month, I've been reminded of lessons that I've learned in the past. Mostly from people from my past. A few of those encounters did a number on my mind and emotion. So much so that I have not been myself. 

I've felt much like I was on a balance beam swaying back and forth and grasping at the air around me to find some sort of balance. 

That's not who I am. 

I am strong. I'm so strong that people typically don't have that power over me. 

However, the recent turn of events were more extreme than I'd expected. I hadn't prepared for it. 

There was a time in my life when I had to pull out every ounce of strength to get through to the other side. I had focus, I had strength, I had discipline, and I had the motivation. 

Looking back, I realize I was way stronger than I ever saw myself. 

The past month was difficult because I was allowing myself to be in that place of unbalance. I knew what it was and I knew what caused it. I also knew perfectly well that in order to get past it, I would have to sit with it for a time. 

Slowly, I've brought myself back. Though, I'm still not satisfied that I've disciplined myself enough to forget the hurt I felt.

Another quick encounter where I caught another glimpse of the way I used to be treated has reminded me that I need to get past that hurt. 

Getting past it allows me to move forward. 

Getting past it allows me to pursue dreams. 

Getting past it allows me to be a better wife/mom. 

Getting past it allows me to be STRONGER than ever. 

But...

but...

BUT .........

I cannot forget what it taught me for those lessons are worth more money than I could ever make. 

Forgetting that is not something I can do, because forgetting those lessons will make me also forget.....

I am stronger  than your words. 

I am stronger  than the power trip you're on. 

I  am stronger  than the small person you'd like me to feel I am. 

I am stronger and I am able to move past what you give me. 

I am stronger than I even know. 

We can all be strong enough when we have to be. 

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."