There is " No Plan B"

I've discussed on this blog once before the option of Plan B. 


My reading of The Shack has brought me and many people I've encountered into a new dimension of understanding  those things in life that aren't part of our first plan. 


Though, as we are going through them it feels as though someone is punishing us. I've been there a few times, and as I've said before the death of my brother was one of those greater times. 


I avoided reading The Shack because I did not want to revisit those emotions. I didn't want to keep asking why or keep not understanding the "plan." I knew the basis of the story and just couldn't bring myself to read about that type of situation or read the families reaction. 


As God always does, he continues to try to get into my thick hard-headed brain and feed my spirit and soul the food it needs to go to the next step. 


Now, as weeks have gone by and I've let the "dust of the book settle" I've tried to keep myself in the same frame of mind that I left the book. 


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Recently, so many of the friends I have either close by or long distances have been sick or have family members sick. 


Some of them had great hurdles to overcome because of how things are with the flu, h1n1, and the increase in pneumonia, or strep. 


For whatever reason, things may not always turn out the way we expect or hope. I've been praying non-stop for specific families the past few weeks. Some have the endings we expect and others have not. 


I've been thinking about this for a while and then today realized:  There is No Plan B in God's plan. He doesn't need a backup. 


We only have a "plan b" because the way we planned it didn't happen or because we expected much different results. Our perceptions require us to have a plan B. 


I know I can find many, many, many "plan b's" in my life and I'm sure you might be able to, as well: 


* adoption
*death of a young family member or a family member for any reason
*illnesses
*divorce
*step parenting
*loss of a job
*broken relationships


I think Plan B's make us feel like we are more in control and just possibly they give us great hope for our future despite whatever tribulation we have had to endure. 


However, I believe that just because "God works incredible good out of unspeakable tragedies doesn't mean He orchestrates the tragedy."


People use to tell me and my family all those generic things you say after someone passes: " God knew something we didn't." "God has a plan" "God has His reasons." There were times I even found myself saying those phrases later in life because that was what I'd heard. But after years of thinking about my own situation and reading as much as I can, my mind opened to a new thought. 


To me those phrases mean that we are in a sense blaming God for that event that has unfolded. Maybe blaming is too strong of a word, but I don't believe God reasoned a tragedy, illness, or struggle. My God doesn't work that way and I'm faithful in knowing that He has the ultimate power to take senseless events and turn them around for the good of all of us. 


He promises to never leave us. His plan is THE plan. It's hard to remember that but God is good and loves us all the time - not just during the stuff we plan. 


"All things must unfold even though it puts all those He loves in the midst of a world of horrible tragedy and loss - even the ones closest to Him." 

Control, God Winks, and Advice

Recently, I posted a quote from one of my new favorite pieces of literature, The Shack. 


"You're going to find this day a lot easier if you simply accept what is, instead of trying to fit it into your preconceived notions."



Not many people responded. As I thought to myself, I thought, maybe people don't really like giving up that control of life random chaos or their already set preconceptions. 

I know I didn't. 


It took me at least a month to get used to the idea of being pregnant again. Of course, Jason and I had discussed it and I knew we'd add to our family, but in my "plan" and my "timing."  I expected to make it a reality "later." Not that much later, just 6 months or so. I wanted time alone with Jason, time to be in my job, and time to just be. 


So, I'm not embarrassed to say that in the middle of everyone's excitement - it took me awhile to mentally get there. Ignorance is bliss and with Maddie, I had no idea how pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting would change my life, my heart, my mind and my spirit. With Avery, I had at least "been there, done that." 


After the announcement of our pregnancy (I say ours because it truly affects us all), I have finally been able to revel in the excitement with everyone else. Now in week 14/15, I have a lot more energy, not feeling as sick, and am able to do the day-to-day routine a lot better. 


But I will not lie. I am not the pregnant lady that will tell you "this is the best I've felt my whole life" or "it was my favorite time in my life." Yes, I realize the blessing; yes, I know what a miracle the whole process is, however, as a semi-control freak with day-to-day operations in my life, it puts a damper on what I can do, what I can eat, etc. I know after 2 what happens to my body, what physical limitations are put on me, how difficult recovery can be, life with a newborn, and so on. 


My mind has finally caught up to what is. 
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I've written about God Winks before. I've even discussed how I was included in SQuire Rushnell's second God Wink book. What an honor that was: talking with him, meeting him, and still corresponding with him. I love the message he conveys in his book and enjoy reading such heartwarming stories about other people who have had "god winks." 


As I've said before, I DO NOT believe in coincidences. It wasn't a coincidence that in my time of panic about the pregnancy that The Shack kept popping up in conversation, in ads, on peoples coffee tables, and in the grocery store. Finally, after about the 7th incident, I threw the book in my cart, looked up and said "Fine." 


Little did I know the healing and the attitude adjustment that it would give me. After putting it down, I said "Tisha, you must stop being so arrogant. His plan goes far and wide." His plans are always much wider and farther than we ever can imagine or see. 

So, presently I'm reading The Alchemist. Like The Shack, it has continually popped up over several years and when I saw it on the shelf, I decided to go with it. It's a fable about a shephard boy finally realizing his dream and following it to find and fulfill his purpose. 


"God has prepared a path for everyone to follow. You just have to read the sign [omens, god winks] that He left for you."


It reminds me so much of the work I've put into my book. I know that the book has a purpose, even if it is just for my girls to have and use during those difficult times in their own lives. 


I must see it through to the end. 
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Today, I began discussing both books and my struggle with my mind catching up with what is and how I've been working on my own book (dream, journey).  As I said that, Madison's former teacher sat across from me and said "I heard/saw a guy today talking about God winks." 


What!? You mean SQuire?


I began sharing with her my knowing SQuire, being in the book and some of the god winks in my own life. It was nice to share a little god wink of our own! 


Funny that today, I sat down to respond to his Facebook message. In it he was giving me advice on what paths to pursue once I finish my own book.  One of the things he said to me was this: 


"Unless YOU get it out of the store...no one else will." 


We have to let go of the control from the things we cannot change, but we must seize those that we can. 


I love this piece of advice because it could be said for everything in life: 
dreams
love
relationships
jobs
attitudes
struggles


Unless WE put the work into it, no one else will and we will never see what can be. 

God Loves Surprises

Anytime I find something worthy of mentioning, I eagerly find my computer, time to blog and something good to drink.

I recently bought The Shack. I have known many people who have read it, recommended it, and loved it. For some reason, I actually resisted the reading. I guess something inside of me knew that the book would have a great affect on my soul.

I bought the book Thursday night and by Saturday had devoured the entire piece like I would a good piece of chocolate. My soul needed the book, the passages, and the imagery at this exact moment. I found myself smiling, thinking, contemplating, and sobbing.

For anyone that has lost someone very dear and close like a child or a sibling, this book will pull out all kinds of emotions from you. It will comfort you, make you think again, and give you a different perspective than you've ever expected. Most likely it will do this to you anyway.

If you feel a tugging to read it. Do it. I'm convinced that you will get something out of it and pass it on to others that may need it.

Here are some of my favorite passages:

Jesus: An awful lot of what is done in my name has nothing to do with me and is often, even if unintentional, very contrary to my purposes.

Papa (God): When all you can see is your pain, perhaps then you lose sight of me.

Papa (God): You're going to find this day a lot easier if you simply accept what is, instead of trying to fit it into your preconceived notions.

Sarayu (Spirit): Many of those so-called bad plants, like this one, contain incredible properties for healing or are necessary for some of the most magnificent wonders when combined with something else.

Jesus: We are not done there.

Papa (God): There is no Plan B.

Jesus: She (God) loves surprises, and even though you might not think it, her timing is always perfect.

This last passage meant a lot more to me than it normally would. In the past few weeks I've had to get use to a new idea that wasn't expected until later on. For all sorts of reasons, it just didn't seem feasible at this exact moment. But later? Yeah, I was good with that. You know, when "my plan and timing" was right. The seemingly random chaos of life has brought us to a new phase in our lives and we are excited to share it with you. Jason, the girls and I will be enjoying one of God's special surprises sometime at the end of March. :)